Psalm 38:4-5, 8, 18, 21-22 (NIV)
My guilt has overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear. My wounds fester and are loathsome because of my sinful folly. I am feeble and utterly crushed; I groan in anguish of heart. I confess my iniquity; I am troubled by my sin. Lord do not forsake me; do not be far from me, my God. Come quickly to help me, my Lord and my Savior.
Have you ever been deeply broken by your sin? The great reformer Martin Luther was plagued by his sin because he did not understand God’s grace. As a result, he would lie face down before an altar for hours attempting to remember and confess every single sin since his last confession. Even though he had been a devout monk, he completely missed the fact that Jesus offered him freedom by grace through faith…and so he lived in misery and captivity until his eyes were opened to the amazing truth of the Gospel as he studied the Book of Romans. Martin Luther had many things wrong, but one thing he had right: He was deeply broken by his sin. So was David, as you can see in today’s verses.
Charles Spurgeon said, “The anger of others I can bear, but not thine. As thy love is most sweet to my heart, so thy displeasure is most cutting to my conscience.” When was the last time the weight of your sin overwhelmed you? Do you ever feel feeble and crushed by your poor choices or hurtful actions? When was the last time you groaned over your iniquity? Does the sin that remains in your life trouble you? There have been several times in my walk with the Lord when I was utterly broken by my sin, but it’s not a regular occurrence. I was born again in 1994 and it certainly broke me back then in the months leading up to my salvation. I was bathing in conviction and drowning in guilt and while no human was pointing out the multitude of sins in my life, the Holy Spirit was highlighting them one…after another…after another. After several months of pain, I finally cried out like David, “Help me, my Lord and my Savior!”
We are reminded in Romans 8:1-3 that there is no condemnation for those of us who are in Christ Jesus, but does that mean we should be free from the guilt and shame of our sin? Jesus himself tell us in the Sermon on the Mount (Mth. 5:4), “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” Later on, in the Book of James we read, “Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners, and purify your hearts, you double-minded. Be wretched and mourn and weep. Let your laughter be turned to mourning and your joy to gloom” (Jas. 4:8-9). Jesus was talking about mourning over our sin before a holy God and James was speaking directly to Believers. Don’t get me wrong here. If you have been born again, you are no longer under condemnation for your sin…but your sin should still break your heart.
The Christian life is full of tension, and while our sin can damage our relationship with the Lord, it can never sever it (Jn. 10:28). Praise God for that! However, that does not release us from our responsibility to fight the sin nature that still indwells us and when it wins, we should feel the full weight of our law-breaking while at the same time rejoicing in the fact that God still loves and accepts us! Deeply broken but deeply grateful. Going back to Spurgeon, with respect to the last verse of this psalm, he leads us to the hope that, “A sense of sin shall melt into the joy of salvation; grief shall lead on to gratitude, and gratitude to joy unspeakable and full of glory.” Cry out today for a renewed sensitivity to your sin, and for the proper mourning it should awaken, but also rejoice dear friend, because that mourning has already been turned into a symphony of praise in light of Christ’s finished work on the cross…for sinners like you and me.
